advice from my better self

on how to go from consuming to creating and awaken the everyday glories...

"We live in a world of theophanies. Holiness comes wrapped in the
ordinary. There are burning bushes all around you. Every tree is full of
angels. Hidden beauty is waiting in every crumb. Life wants to lead you
from crumbs to angels, but this can happen only if you are willing to
unwrap the ordinary by staying with it long enough to harvest its
treasure."
-Macrina Wiederkehr

1. tape a sheet of newsprint to the wall. draw on it every day for a week.
2. wake up with the birds, read a poem, and pick up a pen
3. teach yourself how to sew. scrounge for beautiful patterns at thrift stores regardless of the article of clothing they are attached to.
4. volunteer with your siblings -- let them choose where!
5. make a movie from your best friend's wedding video

What are your early-morning inspirations? What do you really want to do before the day recalls all the things you must do?

Today it's wandering to a completely unoriginal question that has tormented working women since the 1960s: can I take this amazing, intense job and still start a family? I have two jobs before me. One practically screams family friendly, while the other whispers, "are you nuts?" Yet all the lists I'm making lead me towards the second job. All except one -- my list of baby names. Yes, my mind wanders.

skin deep

I don't wear much makeup, but what I do wear, I wear every day. Even Sundays. It's just a habit, I guess. It's the mask I put on to face the world, even if the world doesn't often notice. Makeup counter girls are always flagging me down, thinking mistakenly they have spotted the bare face in the crowd of Georgia peaches. Apparently Atlantans spend more on makeup per capita than even Parisans (you heard it here). And I'm no exception. I have quite the pile of shiny thin sticks that lured me into buying and taking them home with me with their promise of a sparkling, alluring new me.

So when Slim sent me a link to the Cosmetic Safety Database, I wanted to know, but I didn't, because knowing would mean I'd feel compelled to change. Tonight I hesitatingly entered a few everyday items and hoped for the best.

The results? Every item scored at least a six on a badness scale of ten. The worst was a waterproof mascara. It's not looking good for my face the world face...

Ingredients in this product are linked to:
	Cancer
	Developmental/reproductive toxicity
	Violations, Restrictions & Warnings
	Allergies/immunotoxicity
	Other concerns for ingredients used in this product: Persistence and bioaccumulation, Organ system toxicity (non-reproductive), Multiple, additive exposure sources, Irritation (skin, eyes, or lungs), Enhanced skin absorption, Occupational hazards

This manufacturer:
	Compact for Safe Cosmetics signer
	Conducts animal testing

"A change is gonna come"

"Hypocrisy is the first step towards meaningful change." -- Paul Sheldon, senior consultant for Natural Capitalism Solutions.

Despite having recently escaped the mouth of a consultant, I think this may actually be true. Every time I've opened my big mouth to espouse some ideal or moral, I've been motivated to look at my own actions to make sure they are in line with the mouthing off. Those times when they haven't been, I've changed, possible more due to perceived social pressure than anything else. It's what got me to take the bus, ride a bike, stop eating meat (several times actually, but who's counting?), and decide to only look for jobs in the nonprofit sector.

I may or may not be a better person for all this, but at least my actions are a weak echo of my lofty ideals. One step at a time, I'm working to bring those ideals down to earth long enough to change, not the world, but myself. Isn't that all we can really do? Change yourself, make your actions consistent with your ideals, and realize the world may or may not follow.

Sam Cooke was talking about the civil rights movement, but the moral and practical logic of that movement has influenced every social movement since, and I think it's applicable to the environmental movement. Some people will see it as a moral imperative, others see only their bottom line ("The Greening of Fox"), and that's okay. What's important is change.

A Change Is Gonna Come

(Sam Cooke, 1964)

I was born by the river in a little tent

And just like the river, I've been running ever since

It's been a long time coming

But I know a change is gonna come

It's been too hard living, but I'm afraid to die

I don't know what's up there beyond the sky

It's been a long time coming

But I know a change is gonna come

I go to the movie, and I go downtown

Somebody keep telling me "Don't hang around"

It's been a long time coming

But I know a change is gonna come

Then I go to my brother and I say, "Brother, help me please"

But he winds up knocking me back down on my knees

There've been times that I've thought I couldn't last for long

But now I think I'm able to carry on

It's been a long time coming

But I know a change is gonna come

Choice, fate, and higher education

I often use Sergeant Serna as a foil in this space, focus on his falling sheds and sawed up couches, but today, inspired by Georgia's efforts to rid its state colleges and universities of those so-called illegals, I want to say something nice for a change.

Despite our political disagreements, I see Jose as the consummate patriot. Why? Not because he joined army. Not because he supports our nation's leaders unquestioningly. Not because he is willing to die for a strong, if vague, belief in "freedom."

It's simpler than that. It's because he chose this country. He crossed a desert, walking for days with no food and little water. He left his family, his homeland, his linguistic heritage, everything he knew and loved. Left it all behind for some shining opportunity he saw on the horizon, not even guessing it could all turn out to be a mirage. He was not born here by some lucky twist of fate. He chose the US of A, and even when it tried to spit him out, he found a way to stay.

----------------

I just sent my comments about the state's purge of its higher education system of these people it chooses to call illegal. Not understanding how people can label someone else "illegal," continue to call themselves "Christian," and go so far out of their way to NOT feed, NOT clothe, and NOT comfort those illegal people, I focused my comments on the economic impact of cutting Georgians off from higher education because their parents decided to emigrate.

If you want to comment, here's the link. Public Comment Sessions on Undocumented Students.